dreams and more later

I should be doing my homework. But instead I'm writing a diary entry and sipping tomato soup out of a mug.

Last week I had a dream about Clayton. I don't know if I've ever talked about him here, but I wrote about him once on my second diary. You can read it if you're interested. Anyway. I dreamt that I was at an arcade with some friends, and suddenly he was there with a young boy who I presumed was his younger brother. In actuality? I don't know whether or not he has siblings. He was attractive, contrary to reality.

When we were together he sent me a picture of himself he had taken at school, and that's when I began to understand why he masturbated constantly. I commented on the periodic table of elements that could be seen in the background. Because I didn't know what else to say. But that was five years ago. Five years ago my hair was cropped short and I sported coke bottle glasses, so.

Speaking of my appearance, I took a picture of myself last month for a friend that lives in Wisconsin.

Moving on. In the aforementioned dream, Clayton flirted with me and I flirted in return, because I wanted to prove that I wasn't ignorant about such things anymore. He told me I was beautiful and seemed genuinely concerned about me. And then as quickly as he had come, he informed me coldly that I bored him, and that he was leaving to find someone better.

It wasn't until I was awake and in the shower that I realized that my dream had run parallel to what really happened between us. Except this time, there was only a fleeting disappointment, instead of the thick loneliness that robbed me of sleep for a week afterwards.

Last week I finished Behind the Wheel. It seemed to me that my instructor was unaccustomed to communicating with girls.

Pat's on the cusp of slipping into slumber on a nearby couch. He got back from work about ten minutes ago, and Simon (cat no. 1) is curled up on his lap contentedly. I'll write more soon. Maybe this weekend.