a weekend with both good weather and Kate being sexy

Last night Pat told me he'd come to church with me this morning, but I wasn't surprised when he didn't. He closed at Pizza Hut last night and didn't fall asleep until 3 a.m. My mom and I walked to church. We live a few blocks away and the weather has been gorgeous since Friday. For most of the service, the senior choir sang the Mass of the Dead, a requiem that sounded like drinking hard liquor and chain-smoking in the dark. So what I'm saying is, on a beautiful Sunday morning, the air warm and thick with the songs of birds, I was subjected to a Catholic funeral mass in a Lutheran church when no one had died. It was intended to remind us of our mortality during the Lenten season. And it did. Because the sanctuary was littered with restless children, wailing and shrieking abruptly and filling the room with their shrill, frivolous words. One boy behind me? He and his mother would whisper to each other for several minutes, and then his mother would violently shush him, and he would shush his mother back, and for several seconds they would shush one another, like a sick little game. I tried to express my annoyance by shifting uncomfortably in my seat and glaring over my shoulder, but I was unsuccessful. And then. THEN. The mother? She gives her son a fucking bag of cereal! So then I had to listen to peewee much on handfuls godforsaken Cocoa Puffs. And when the service ended, I fought my way through the throngs of people to the door. Because I had just listened to forty minutes of death and children. And I didn't know which was worse. Probably children.

Anyway. Yesterday Pat and I walked to Caribou Coffee and then to Game Stop, where we browsed a vast selection of video and computer games. After that we drove to Dairy Queen, Auto Zone (to get seat covers for Pat's car), McDonald's, and twice to Pat's house. Today we rented a Dragonfly, because the commercials for it were refreshingly vague. After eating out we wandered through a nearby park.

I looked sexy on Saturday. One of Pat's coworkers from Pizza Hut drove by as Pat and I were on our way back to my house, and he paused for a minute or two to complain about management with Pat. He apologized to me for his vulgar language. Later that night while Pat was working, the said coworker (who I will christen "Bo," because that's his name) asked Pat why he moved to Minnesota from California. Pat told him that it was because of me. Bo replied that he understood why. To reiterate, it's because I'm sexy.

And, another coworker of Pat's thinks I wear a C cup. Anyone that knows me is probably laughing. Anyone that doesn't, well - I'm... not. Imagine if I were sexy and voluptuous.

So, I'm thinking of applying for a job at Pizza Hut. Which isn't true. But it would be like sunbathing for my ego.

Also on Saturday, Rick challenged me to weave a parody containing the phrase "you taste like hate" and the word "teeth." I accepted the challenge.

The cello is delicious.

An entry both today and yesterday. That hasn't happened in over a year.